An Ode to My First Adult Apartment
Here’s a three-decker (not mine) for reference!
I grew up in the first floor of a three-decker in Worcester, MA. She is the first home in my active memory files, the home that has watched me grow up, the walls who’ve honored my introspection, silence and privacy, and the backyard whose watched and hosted all outdoor shenanigans, snowball fights, parties, and childhood games. Now I’ve come back to her, but as an adult, living a floor above the apartment that raised me.
Before I moved in, it had been ten years since anyone lived in this apartment, but there are so many gems here: the wooden floors, the antique heater and gas stove (the stove doubles as a heater in for the kitchen and bathroom area), the large windows, the brick wall, the bathroom tile, and ample space for lounging/studio space. It was built in the 1910s, and I think its oldness is the most charming thing about it. Native to New England (especially Worcester), three-deckers are typical of light-framed, wood construction, and are popular here in Worcester, Jamaica Plain, Fall River, and other areas in Massachusetts and New England.
It’s taken me a year to start intentionally furnishing this apartment, but it’s also taken me a year to embrace this temporary permanency. In this location, I’m so close to several Worcester gems, hole-in-the-wall restaurants and parks. It’s allowed me a close glance at all the rapid changes happening in Worcester, but from the luxury of my own space, where everything has pretty much stayed the same. Warm, vibrant, and mine.
As many close to me know, I flew down to GA in the beginning of the year to visit my boyfriend, Phillip, to celebrate our fourth anniversary together. Two days after I’d arrived, the pandemic shook the world, and several states quickly began shutting down, closing up shop and quarantining.
In a matter of days, my flight got cancelled, I lost all three of my jobs (and a potential new one I was excited about went on a hiring freeze), and my state heavily advised that if we weren’t already in the state or nearby, to stay away. It was an overwhelming several weeks, but I’m so thankful to have been quarantined with the Warfield family. My boyfriend’s grandparents— wise, funny, practical and Southern—took me in to their home, allowed me to dwell in their space for the past 5 months, and fed me so many delicious home-made meals. It would take me several lifetimes to repay them, especially Phillip’s grandmother, for the care and kindnesses she has extended to me throughout our relationship.
Coming back home, I thought, would be heavy and overwhelming. I have never handled transitions well, and in this case, I dreaded transitioning back to a long distance relationship and navigating this unusual terrain in such a terribly unsure stage of my life.
Where am I going to work? When will I see Phillip again? Am I ready to feel lonely? Am I prepared to be alone again? I’ve never been forced to pour so much energy into my relationship with myself—how do I go about it now? How does it look like to love myself now?
But as I entered my apartment, with my calendar still dog-eared and pinned on the month of February, my mail spread out across my coffee table just as I’d left it months ago, and the three scraps of trash I’d left in my bathroom trash bin—I was filled with immense gratefulness to this place, for her audacity to stay the exactly the same while her environment has been rapidly changing, and her warmth, her vibrance and permanence.
So much has changed this year for all of us, and I have taken the time to sit and mourn all of it. But having a space that’s unchanging, that’s just your own—whether it’s an apartment, studio, car, office, classroom—that you’ve touched and nurtured and poured love into, will always love you back in the most joyful, wholesome ways.
This apartment—a kindness extended to me by my beautiful mother, who lives right below me—has seen me grow into an adult. It taught me how to turn on a gas heater and how to maintain it, how to insulate my windows in the winter to save myself some $$ on the heating bill for the coldest, New England months (because, yikes). It’s given me the space to express myself, to adopt some of my mother’s never-ending line of plant babies, display pops of color, and become a cozy haven for me amid this turbulent, insane year. It honors my silence, my glooms-and-dooms, and also celebrates my independence.
All photos captured by me.
Inspired by Laura Fenton’s Little Book of Living Small, which is dedicated to celebrating small spaces (in apartments that are lived in by REAL people, not editorialized and staged), has taught me to show-off and find joy in the process of designing my own apartment and structuring it to support my lifestyle needs. Right now, I’m setting up to be work-from-home friendly, to represent my essence, and to ultimate be a space I enjoy dwelling in.
So here are some of my favorite corners and pieces of my space in its current state, with no alternations or staging.
My favorite little corner. So much texture, light, and color.
The view of my living room as soon as I enter the apartment.
The entry way + all my winter jackets.
I love yellows and browns. I have an eclectic decorating style so things rarely match, but this is probably one of the few times that they do.
When I turned 23, I had a small group of friends over for a paint party hosted by my sweet artist friend @Rebletters. To christen my first year in the apartment, I also wanted everyone to sign these canvases that spell out “HOME”. I want my home, wherever I am, to represent the people I love, to display their art and their words. After these are done being signed and written on, I’ll take the tape off and hang them up right about my love seat.
Prego should srsly sponsor me at this point. I only save my pasta sauce jars to hold my flowers. These dried ones are from my favorite local flower shop, Sparkle on Park.
One of my gas heaters in my dining room, which I’m actually converting into my work studio area (I’ll do a full reveal once it’s done!)
Built-in shelves in my studio area! Aiming to buy a few more plants to spruce it up.
And of course, my Morgan Harper Nichols calendar.
Probably the only side of my living room I ever actually sit on.
Little preview of my temporary work area. Looking to buy a new desk + shelves soon.
My gas stove is basically my pride and joy.
My maid-of-honor bouquet from my best friend’s wedding now sits on my kitchen table, gracing it with beauty.
How have you decorated/renovated your space to reflect your personality and lifestyle needs? I’m obsessed with seeing how my friends + people I know go about setting up their rooms and apartments, so PLEASE feel free to share with me!
Before you go, here’s some links you should definitely check out.
Tracy Pendergast + Riley Youngstrom have launched the most vibrant corner of the internet, Daisy Made, dedicated to nurturing + celebrating creativity in all its beautiful forms. If you’re into baking, reading about cool people, growing plant bbs, or decorating your space (and, like, tons more) you’ll find a spot to cozy up in for a while.
One of my GOOD friends Madeline Mace just shared a giant, beautiful piece of her mind through her powerful gallery show opening, Hysteria. Check her out forever.